TV Listings

Check out WDER'S new Wednesday lineup!

REALITY TV

So, You Think You Can Finish This Bowl Of Spaghetti? - 8:00 p.m.
Arnold is sent home after the judges catch him hiding spaghetti under his hat.

Hold Your Breath - 9:00 p.m.
The orange team holds their breath for nearly six minutes, breaking the record from season 3.

Bowling Wives - 10:00 p.m.
Cassandra spends all of Mike's Blast! Cola Open winnings on a new forehead, and a fist fight in lane six between the wives spills into lane seven, ruining Bruno's perfect game.


MOVIE NIGHT - 11:00 p.m.

How Father Ernie Got His Pews Back



6:20 a.m. - Recovering from the loss of a pistachio

Meetings

Beefy's Fast Food Hut - Store #664
Staff meeting

Items to discuss:

* Please stop accepting golf pencils as currency
* Our drive thru does not offer "free toenail clipping after 6pm"


June 24, 3:00 p.m.

Openings

The Pet Place
Grand re-opening

"We finally got the crocodile to leave, ya'll!"

All-new:

* Penguin obedience classes begin July 1
* Free caterpillar adoption Thursdays
* "Poopy Parlor" open ("Peepee Palace" closing September, 2010)


The Pet Place - 450 Kaynesport-Plumptin Interchange, off Highway 32

For sale

June car payment

* $187
* Was due June 2
* $25 late fee free with purchase


$190
Jake 555-2201

For sale

Used video games

Shampoo Man
Apple Thief 2010
Flag Football: National Championship
Shampoo Man vs. Australia


$4 each
Kevin 555-4488

Home for rent

0 BR
6 BATH

* Within minutes of Dirt Road 7
* Half bottle of ketchup free with rental
* Used in the filming of the 2006 movie Armadillo Schoolhouse Rock


7066 Berman Alley, Kaynesport

$85/month
Gary & Maureen 555-1616

Meetings

Pat's Pizza
June meeting


On the agenda:

* Please stop accepting photographs of dollar bills as currency
* The pine cone pizza is no longer on the menu


June 19, 12:00 p.m.

For sale

Head of lettuce

* Greenish-brown with a lot of character


$6
Ron 555-8784

For sale

Old domain names


www.kaynesportpossumsbaseball.com
www.isthatkittypee.com
www.moviescriptmadness.bcm/nerdydancing
www.firesaxophonistgary.net
www.celebrityanklesprains.blogspot.com
www.derwoodcollege/intercollegiateathletics_salamitoss
www.tonysivemet.net/tonyniprio


$8 each
Bobby 555-2323

Police report

Keaton Vance
Age: 32
Pants: No
Sandwich in pocket: Chopped slippers with mayo

June 13 - Mr. Vance was arrested for impersonating a globe. Beverly Khan, the alleged victim, called the authorities saying Mr. Vance had become violent after she refused to point out Australia.


Previous arrests:

January 2, 2007 - Taken into police custody for failure to remove his stirrups, salami belt and watermelon helmet in a government building.

August 24, 2001 - Felony hiccup-and-run

November 16, 1999 - Found in possession of more than 500 caterpillar legs with intent to distribute


VANCE, KEATON
Bail: $9

For sale

RufusBreath-brand dog food



* Recommended by 1 out of 5 men named Doug


5 for $1 or all 44 for $6
Doug 555-1221

For sale

Arnold

* Bad cough
* Comes with several condiment stains on several articles of clothing
* Starred in the 2008 documentary Finding Arnold's Sneakers


$150 or best offer
Darlene 555-6761

For sale

Toast

* Four pieces available
* Interesting trades for un-toasted bread considered


$.50 each or $1.75 for all four
Kenneth 555-9227

For sale

Murray "Paper Towel Man" Hadler autographed paper towel



* Acquired at 2009 Window Washer Expo


$300
Carl 555-9010