Meetings

Sam's Salad Buffet
Full staff meeting

On the agenda:

* We do not offer chiropractic care at the drive thru
* The customers are not allowed to take home the sneeze guards


Tuesday, 1:00 p.m.

For sale

Magazines

Air Whistler (November, 1994)
Bologna Tower Builder Monthly (June, 2003)
The Journal of Modern American Waving (March, 2009; October 2009)
Ravioli Goggles Maker (January, 2003; May, 2003; August, 2003)


$4 each
Paul 555-8102

Public Service Announcement

Let's put an end to pumpkin-on-pumpkin crime.

Call 555-6617 to find out how you can help.

For sale

VHS


Honey, I Glued a lot of Paper Clips to the Kids
Dances With Seashells


$3 each or both for $5
Aaron 555-5007

For sale

Used car for sale

1990 Hixon Raccoon SZ

* 296,000 miles
* Red w/dried horseradish racing stripes
* Missing gas pedal, roof
* Used in the filming of the classic holiday video Whose Baby Daddy Is This?


$68 or best offer
Antonio 555-2122

For sale

1/2 ham sandwich


$3 or best offer
Sandy 555-3321

For sale

Otis Peakaboo autographed half apple




$220
Sal 555-9931

Advertisement

Plumptin City College
"What it was isn't anymore"




Classes forming now for winter semester

* Survey: Guys named Tony
* Giraffes in the Theater
* History of Mustard, 1950-1980

And many more - pick the schedule that's right for you!


Intercollegiate athletics
Go Aardvarks!

* Men's and Women's Lettuce Toss
Co-coaches Tamara Blakeley and John Simpson
* Women's Ear Pulling
Hall of fame coach Wendy Arnold
* Men's Wheelbarrow
Coach Hal Winfield
* Men's Elevator Riding
Coach Pete Hannington


Application/advisement information: 555-5663

Openings

Paco's Movie House
Grand opening!




November movies:

Karate Frog 2
The Drew Sisters in Forehead Soup
The Devil Wears Reading Glasses
Mustache: Impossible

Documentary films:

Watch Darren Go Bald
Salami Murphy-Live in Kenton City


Paco's - 502 Vanderells Lane, Kaynesport

For sale

Rice pool

* Uncooked
* Gravy slide sold separately


$300
Greg and Linda 555-3401


** Interesting trades for pasta bath tubs considered **

For sale

Bologna wallets

* Hand-crafted
* Now available with bread-crust-Velcro


- $15 each
- 10 or more: $12 each
- 50 or more: $9 each


Patty 555-7100

Meetings

Friends of Ken Laurie
Fall meeting


Items to discuss:

* Ken's 7th grade report card: Q&A
* FKL Flashback: May 6, 2001, the day we accidentally kidnapped Len Korie's canary
* Ken Camp 4: what went right, what went wrong


October 23, 2:00 p.m.

Services

Freelance critic for hire

Whatever you need criticized, I'm your man.

* jailhouse cafeteria food
* home movies
* how a person really looks in shorts
* in-laws' nostril hair
* your goldfish's intelligence
 

and more

$9/hour weekdays
$12/hour weekends
Benson 555-2310

Meetings

Goober City Muskrats semi-pro basketball
Pre-season meeting


On the agenda:

- Why we can only play on eight-foot rims in practice

- Pre-season fall down awards
- Your socks go on before your shoes


January 4, 7:30 p.m. at Coach Sanderson's house