My son's latest original piece titled "My Dad Kent"
* Crayon-on-paper
* Comes with three used crayons (one blue, two black)
$75
Kent 555-3773
** Ask about our installment plans **
February 28, 2013
February 27, 2013
Meetings
Car pool to work
Pre-March 4 meeting
February 28, 6:30 p.m. in back two rows of Paul's van
Motivational tape/cassette player: Linda
Moistened paper towels: Keaton
Practice toll money: Amanda
Pre-March 4 meeting
February 28, 6:30 p.m. in back two rows of Paul's van
Motivational tape/cassette player: Linda
Moistened paper towels: Keaton
Practice toll money: Amanda
February 26, 2013
February 25, 2013
For rent
Leftover confetti
* Used in the making of the 2013 independent film Hippo Wedding
* Free directions to my friend Seth's house (on unshredded paper) with rental agreement
$9/hour
Thomas 555-7491
* Used in the making of the 2013 independent film Hippo Wedding
* Free directions to my friend Seth's house (on unshredded paper) with rental agreement
$9/hour
Thomas 555-7491
February 24, 2013
For sale
Reality TV on DVD
* Do Your Grandma & Grandpa Have To Be Here? - Final season
* Ant Farm Swap - Complete series
* The Real Wasp Nests of the Plumptin County Public Library - Season 1
$6 each
Wendy 555-0032
* Do Your Grandma & Grandpa Have To Be Here? - Final season
* Ant Farm Swap - Complete series
* The Real Wasp Nests of the Plumptin County Public Library - Season 1
$6 each
Wendy 555-0032
February 23, 2013
February 22, 2013
February 21, 2013
Meetings
Flight 1263 from Poog Valley
Row J post-flight meeting
* Taking inventory: how many tray tables did we end up with?
3:15 p.m. at Gate 9, near the men's restroom
Row J post-flight meeting
* Taking inventory: how many tray tables did we end up with?
3:15 p.m. at Gate 9, near the men's restroom
February 20, 2013
For sale
1/2 roast beef sandwich
* Contains 17% more mayonnaise than any other sandwich in my neighborhood, according to a morning study
* Four napkins (one contains some mayonnaise) free with purchase
$3
Hal 555-5996
Also available: elderly man and a slightly-used motor scooter. Inquire within.
* Contains 17% more mayonnaise than any other sandwich in my neighborhood, according to a morning study
* Four napkins (one contains some mayonnaise) free with purchase
$3
Hal 555-5996
Also available: elderly man and a slightly-used motor scooter. Inquire within.
February 19, 2013
Award winner
2013 Build Your Dream House: 14th place
Congratulations to Murray, Qwayshon and the rest of the team.
- D. Morris
February 18, 2013
For sale
Portions of the phone book
* T-W for West Kaynesport available
* Several pages appeared in the 2012 documentaries Is It Spelled Torkelson Or Torkleson? and Calling Janet Vanderells
* Free plumbing company refrigerator magnet with purchase
Call for pricing list
Brent 555-2008
* T-W for West Kaynesport available
* Several pages appeared in the 2012 documentaries Is It Spelled Torkelson Or Torkleson? and Calling Janet Vanderells
* Free plumbing company refrigerator magnet with purchase
Call for pricing list
Brent 555-2008
February 17, 2013
Public Service Announcement
Don't let your peppers and onions give in to tomato pressure.
It's not too late, call 555-8343 to help turn your vegetable's life around.
February 16, 2013
February 15, 2013
Services
Advice man for hire
* Don't wash your car with honey mustard
* Bringing a boogie board into a hot tub
* Making a pot roast out of a molehill
* Opening/closing windows 101
* What not to shout at a ballet recital
Call for rates and availability
Pierre 555-4710
* Don't wash your car with honey mustard
* Bringing a boogie board into a hot tub
* Making a pot roast out of a molehill
* Opening/closing windows 101
* What not to shout at a ballet recital
Call for rates and availability
Pierre 555-4710
February 14, 2013
February 13, 2013
For sale
Chicken broth
* About 8 ounces
* Plastic spoon OR one oyster cracker free with purchase
* Plenty of container options available, including pants pocket (NEW!)
$4 or best offer
Samantha 555-6622
* About 8 ounces
* Plastic spoon OR one oyster cracker free with purchase
* Plenty of container options available, including pants pocket (NEW!)
$4 or best offer
Samantha 555-6622
February 12, 2013
For hire
Nose hair trimmer for hire
* Must provide trimmer
* Priced per hair
Contact for rates and availability
Percy 555-1007
** Call now and receive three free vintage 1970s nose hairs **
* Must provide trimmer
* Priced per hair
Contact for rates and availability
Percy 555-1007
** Call now and receive three free vintage 1970s nose hairs **
February 11, 2013
For sale
Cucumber
The former "Pride of the Produce Section" has fallen on hard times. Was the top cucumber selected for last Saturday's salad, but mold issues forced us to go with extra celery.
Looking for him to go to a good home to get a fresh start, or at the very least be part of a cucumber puppet show.
$14 or best offer
Sam & Alex 555-4881
The former "Pride of the Produce Section" has fallen on hard times. Was the top cucumber selected for last Saturday's salad, but mold issues forced us to go with extra celery.
Looking for him to go to a good home to get a fresh start, or at the very least be part of a cucumber puppet show.
$14 or best offer
Sam & Alex 555-4881
February 10, 2013
Meetings
What The Book? reading group
Winter meeting
Books to discuss:
* Idiot's Guide To The Pants Pocket
* Greer's Law Books: Leaf Possession
* The Girl With The Road Cone Tattoo
February 11, 4:30 p.m. at Ralph's condo
Winter meeting
Books to discuss:
* Idiot's Guide To The Pants Pocket
* Greer's Law Books: Leaf Possession
* The Girl With The Road Cone Tattoo
February 11, 4:30 p.m. at Ralph's condo
Services
Hat-removal service
"I'll remove your hat in 60 seconds or less, or my name isn't Paul."
* Wool hats: $4
* All other hats: $3.50
** Winter special **
Have three hats removed, get one jacket sleeve removed FREE
Hal 555-3341
"I'll remove your hat in 60 seconds or less, or my name isn't Paul."
* Wool hats: $4
* All other hats: $3.50
** Winter special **
Have three hats removed, get one jacket sleeve removed FREE
Hal 555-3341
February 9, 2013
Services
Water fountain concierge service available
* Buttons pushed
* Gum-to-fountain relations
* Where's the nearest water fountain?
* Buttons pushed
* Gum-to-fountain relations
* Where's the nearest water fountain?
Call for free pamphlet
Shameka 555-6156
Shameka 555-6156
February 8, 2013
Meetings
Calendar Watchers
Winter meeting
On the agenda:
* What the heck is happening on April 22nd anyway?
* Days We Can Do Without with Dr. Elroy Riles, Part 7: September 19th
* When is it going to be March?
February 12, 4:00 p.m. at Maureen's condo
Winter meeting
On the agenda:
* What the heck is happening on April 22nd anyway?
* Days We Can Do Without with Dr. Elroy Riles, Part 7: September 19th
* When is it going to be March?
February 12, 4:00 p.m. at Maureen's condo
February 7, 2013
February 6, 2013
Announcements
Drunville Vipers semi-pro basketball
Additions to 2013 promotional calendar
February 19 - Taco seasoning packet (first 5,000 fans)
March 6 - Garbage bag of leaves
March 8 - Rearview Mirror Night
March 23 - Vintage Phone Book Day
April 3 - Throw walnuts at the referees pre-game (first 1,000 fans 12-under)
Tickets: 555-7738
Additions to 2013 promotional calendar
February 19 - Taco seasoning packet (first 5,000 fans)
March 6 - Garbage bag of leaves
March 8 - Rearview Mirror Night
March 23 - Vintage Phone Book Day
April 3 - Throw walnuts at the referees pre-game (first 1,000 fans 12-under)
Tickets: 555-7738
February 5, 2013
For sale
Gravel-filled envelopes
* Perfect for that special someone *
Call for pricing list
Maurice 555-1291
* Perfect for that special someone *
Call for pricing list
Maurice 555-1291
February 4, 2013
February 3, 2013
Meetings
Flight 316 to Plumptin City
Row T meeting
On the agenda:
* Don't chew on the seat in front of you
* Setting up a stand in the restroom and selling individual peanuts: the best corners
* Ice cube hoarding for the walk to baggage claim will be handled by row treasurer, Beverly
February 7, 2:00 p.m. in the south parking lot by the nature store
Row T meeting
On the agenda:
* Don't chew on the seat in front of you
* Setting up a stand in the restroom and selling individual peanuts: the best corners
* Ice cube hoarding for the walk to baggage claim will be handled by row treasurer, Beverly
February 7, 2:00 p.m. in the south parking lot by the nature store
February 2, 2013
February 1, 2013
For sale
Leftovers
Plenty of items for sale:
* Egg shells (4)
* Yellow stuff
* Piece of birthday cake ('THDA' visible on piece)
Friday specials available for the first time:
* Two baby carrots
* Microwave door (*Rare*)
Call for pricing list
Ahmad 555-6177
Plenty of items for sale:
* Egg shells (4)
* Yellow stuff
* Piece of birthday cake ('THDA' visible on piece)
Friday specials available for the first time:
* Two baby carrots
* Microwave door (*Rare*)
Call for pricing list
Ahmad 555-6177
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