Obituaries

Dennis Lambert
1852-2008

Beloved tax attorney and advocate of same-sex antiquing, Dennis died doing what he loved: sitting on his recliner, counting the hair on his head. He was most proud of his lawnmower collection, which by last count had reached triple digits. Survived by his son, Dennis Jr. (124) and daugther, Martha (117).


Darlene Macafferty
1867-2008

Darlene is best-known for her starring roles in the ground-breaking television documentary, Growing up Headless. In 1957, she successfully lobbied to have the sidewalks in her hometown of Sandlebury removed. Survived by her pet rabbit, Cecil.