March 27, 2010

Squirrel for sale

Age: 7

Marital status: Divorced, Martha (woodchuck)
Claim to fame: Has won 11 pine cone seed eating contests, including in August, 2009 when his finals opponent and longtime rival, Ernie was disqualified for using performance-enhancing crickets
Moment of shame: One of the original actors in the ill-fated Bjorn's Acorn Porn series (November, 2005 - January, 2006)

$35 or best offer
Randy 555-8871

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