January 11, 2011

Child for sale


Age: 9
Pluses: Ate a Plumptin County-record 11 crayons (January, 2009); pulls hair at a fourth-grade level
Minuses: Pet lizard missing since last Thursday; refuses to go anywhere without celery in his pockets
Sleeps: in a laundry basket in the attic

* Led 2009 little league team in outfield fall downs (26) and longest cry (17 minutes 42 seconds), and won "Purplest Bruise" and "Least Attractive Sister" awards at team banquet.

$310 or best offer
Carlton & Tameka 555-7734

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